The Ebb and Flow of Interests

Over the years, I’ve found that my hobbies and interests sometimes ebbs and flows.

I’ll have a period of about six to eight months where I’m all about playing, and reading about, video games of all kinds, for example

Then, as seems to be happening now, I find myself losing interest. When I’m playing, it starts to feel like I’m going through the motions, and not really enjoying myself. It’s times like these that I take a break, adjust my leisure activities, and wait for that kid-like spark of excitement to return.

Noticing this shift in recent days was what prompted me to write this piece. I wanted to outline what I’ve learned about the idea that some interests seem to be persistent, while others can come and go — and then come back again — and that’s perfectly fine.

As with virtually all aspects of life, it’s taken me a while to arrive at this contented place, and if I can help others to arrive there sooner, then I will be a happy man.

You don’t have to sit in it

There have been times in my life where I would find myself losing interest in a hobby or pass-time, yet I would continue to engage in it regardless. For some of them, they may have been part of a routine that I didn’t even think of breaking. For others, they were weaved into my personal identity — an identity I feared changing.

Either way, for much of my life, I wouldn’t adjust my habits, routines, or perspectives on many of these optional parts of my life; I would sludge on, glass-eyed, doing what I always did despite having lost the joy, or whatever other benefit I previously got from it. Eventually, my interest would return, but I now know that I could have put it down, walked away, and come back when I truly wanted to — if that ever happened.

I’ve come to know that many interests in life will shift. Many will return, and many will not — both is ok. The interests you hold, and the pass-times you engage in are part of who you are at that period in your life. Trying to hold them in a static shape is the antithesis of personal development.

When the thing you loved to do becomes blah, get up and walk away. You can take a short break, or move on to something new entirely.

Quick note: Don’t quit when it gets hard

I’m not saying it’s good to abandon a pursuit when it becomes difficult, just to be clear.

In this article, I’m talking about hobbies and general interests, not skills you’re working to develop, instruments you’re trying to play, languages you’re working to learn, or the like.

If you were reading this and thinking it was giving you justification to quit something you committed to developing, you’re out of luck. Stick to your commitments.

Now, back to the main topic.

Moving on is ok

Stepping away from a pass-time doesn’t mean you can never return, it just means you’ve lost the spark and are waiting for it to return. If/When it does return, you’ll find a renewed passion that reminds you of why you loved that thing to begin with.

It’s ok to move on to something new. The thing you’re moving on from will always be there, should you choose to return. Plus, you may find something else you like even more — something you didn’t even know existed.

It may be scary to do so — especially if the pass-time you’ve lost interest in is tied to your identity — but I promise you that you’ll be glad you did.

Took a break, returned, and found a renewed excitement and joy = good.

Took a break, found something new, then returned with new perspectives that made you see the initial pass-time in a new light = good.

Took a break, and never really returned, moving on to new interests = good.

Change is fun, if you let it happen

Who you are throughout your life, and how you choose to spend your free time, should both shift. The first certainly does, whether we recognize it or not, and the second should be allowed to shift in order for us to develop and grow as people.

Plus, it’s way more fun to explore what’s out there than it is to sit in a routine that’s become a stale puddle.